This week in my article at Gutter Magazine, I talked about something that is taboo for many – anal sex. I mainly tried to dispel some of the myths that people assume about this sexual act. But, as I hinted at in the article, there are more mental aspects of anal that come into play in a D/s sexual encounter.
It was only the second night I was with Daddy J when he asked me if I wanted him in my ass. My first thought was fear and that it was NOT something I ever wanted to do. But, I felt this overwhelming trust in him and desire to please him. I didn’t speak – I simply nodded. I could tell he was not really expecting my agreement, but I also saw his pleasure that I was willing to let him have his way with me. He grabbed the lube and slowly stuck his finger in first, rubbing my back with his other hand to calm me and help me relax. I could hear him smile as he whispering told what a good girl I was.
As he entered me with his hard cock, I was more nervous than I think I had ever been. But somehow I knew that he wouldn’t hurt me and I was so committed to making sure he enjoyed it. It wasn’t about me – it was about providing for him and completely releasing myself to his control. It was one of the first times that I suspected there was more to me than I even knew. I was beginning to learn my true submissive self.
There are a couple of reasons why anal plays a large role in many D/s sexual encounters. First and foremost, it can be extremely pleasurable for both partners, while at the same time, invoking the thoughts of doing something that is taboo. But also, for a Dominant, it can provide an ultimate sense of power. He is taking something that she may not want to give up. He is complete control over her and both of their pleasure. She is submitting to him fully and is focused completely on his pleasure. For a submissive, it can also make her feel especially vulnerable. She knows he is taking this from her whether she wants him to or not. Also, she may feel dirty for doing something that she “shouldn’t” enjoy. This can spell a very strong power exchange for both partners, which always intensifies the scene. Anal is not generally all a scene is focused on, but it can mentally set the stage for the rest of the play. This can also deepen the intimacy between the Dom and the submissive, which also makes everything more pleasurable.