Wednesday, March 30, 2011

More Playing With My Neighbor

When I wrote the post about my former neighbor, MP, the other day, I wasn’t sure how he was going to take it. I was worried he might have been upset that I was talking about what happened between us so long ago. I also didn’t want it to cause any friction in our friendship or make him feel uncomfortable at all when talking with me. He is the only person who really knows me that I have shared this side of myself with and the only one who really knows the extent of my submission and serving my former Daddy, J. I didn’t want to lose that, so I got a little nervous when he IM-ed me after reading my blog that day. I slowly clicked and saw “Aww! You remember me!” I was so relieved that not only was he not upset, he was flattered that I chose to use one of our encounters in my blog. He even commented on the post later:

Monday, March 28, 2011

Answering Your Questions - Week 1

A couple of weeks ago, I signed up for a fun online Q & A site called Formspring. You can ask your "friends" questions (with your name or anonymously) and then see the answers. Feel free to go there and ask away and once a week I will post some of the questions and answers here.

What's the first thing that you usually notice about someone you meet?
Usually their eyes. I think eyes can tell a lot about a person. Their intentions, their level of honesty, the willingness to be open, etc. A good smile also helps win me over, but I definitely love looking people right in the eye :)

What's the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
The first thing? Probably "Just a few more minutes! That dream was getting so hot!"

When you fail so hard that you want to crawl up in a ball and die, how does Daddy help you to feel better?
Well, I have only had one Daddy for a short time. And it did happen once last summer. He let me have a little bit of time to fall apart and cry. But then he curled up behind me and held me in bed. He ran his fingers through my hair and reassured me that I was doing my best and that was what he wanted. He and I actually wrote about it here.
But, now that we are not together, the strength to pick myself back up has to come from inside me. And that has been tough since it is only recent that we parted ways. But I keep the faith that all the lessons he taught me, I can also keep close and remember when I find someone else.

What is the one thing sexually you have not tried, afraid to try and have watched and it intrigues you?
I am sure there are lots of things out there I haven't tried that I would like to. The one thing I think about lately is being with two men at the same time. My most recent D talked about sharing me and making me please other men for his pleasure, but we never got there. I think I would have really enjoyed doing that for him and being able to please more than one man at a time.

If you could erase a single thing from your memory bank, what would it be?
I am not sure that I would. Everything we experience, even bad things, shape who we are. And, if I didn't remember or the bad thing that happened, I would fear I might actually repeat it. At least if I remember the bad along with the good, as long as I have learned from everything, I think it is best to experience it all, and then some!

Once a sub/slave has experienced D/s, do you think she could go back to a vanilla lifestyle, or will something always be missing?
A great question, but not one I feel I have enough experience with to answer as well as I would like. I am fairly new to discovering this submissive side to myself. I am enjoying every minute of it and definitely enjoy exploring and pushing limits I never knew I could. It is also intense on me emotionally, but it makes everything that much more satisfying. My lifestyle is pretty vanilla, but do I really think I could go back to a more vanilla sex life? I think if I had to, maybe? But I also believe that this is truly who I was meant to be and even in a more vanilla sex life, parts would just seep through. I know I would miss the erotic nature of it all if I wasn't engaging in a D/s sexual relationship.

I've had a crush on you for awhile but I couldn't admit it.. I took a picture of your name written on my body and put it here: [insert the random website here] sign up and search for SubLilGirl guess who i am.
Umm .. although I appreciate the flattery, I find it highly doubtful that you truly know who I am and even MORE doubtful that you wrote my name on your body. Plus - I am just not the type to blindly click on random links. But thanks for the thoughts ;)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

My Former Neighbor

A long time ago, I met a guy online (we will call him MP). We would talk through IM, flirt, tease each other etc. I never was really sure if we would meet or even if we did if anything would happen. But we had an amazing time just working each other up. Up until that point in my life, I had only had sex in relationships. But then, one night we had finished an intense session of online teasing and playing when, through talking, we realized we were neighbors. We lived in the same apartment complex only a few yards away from each other. We finally met up one night after teasing ourselves into a frenzy. When I got there, we were both so worked up, there wasn’t even much talk or foreplay. From then, we would play sexually in person, late at night. He loved to watch me masturbate for him. At the time, I knew that I loved the fact that he would tell me what he wanted to see, how he wanted me to do it, and also when I could cum. I hadn’t realized until much, much later that this also was very submissive in nature of me. We are still friends (although he is very happily married now, so we no longer play) and he is so encouraging of me to continue to search for a Dom and explore this side of myself. He is the only friend who I know personally (not just through online here) besides my recent Dom (J) that knows anything about my submissive side. It is nice to have him support me and encourage me throughout it all.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Why Can't Some Sex Dreams Be Real?

After talking with daddy last Friday for so long, I must admit I have had amazing sex dreams about the places that he was planning to lead me to next on my submissive journey. He had been working me and training me to serve other men for his pleasure, and more than one man at a time at that. He asked me how I thought it might have played out, and I hadn’t given it much thought at the time, but last night, my dreams revealed an interesting, and very sexy scenario.

He had told me to wear a certain dress that we had bought shopping a couple of months back. He told me to go to a very nice hotel that overlooked the water. He had told me what to pack and when I arrived to go to the concierge desk and get an envelope he had left for me. I arrived all prettied up in the dress and the heels and thigh high stockings he loved so much and a sexy pair of black lacy underwear and a push up black lacy bra. When I got the envelope from the desk, it had the room key in it along with a short note:

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

What is it they say about Absence?

Sorry I haven’t been writing more lately. I have allowed myself to get wrapped back up in work since daddy released me from his service, and I have found myself drifting alone. Daddy and I have talked a little bit here and there, and it still isn’t easy. No matter how amazing the chemistry and sex was and how well we fit together in our respective D/s roles, we just ultimately want different things. He wished me well and even told me that I deserve to have all that I want. Of course, he told me if I ever change my mind, or just want a little play time, he will be there for me. He also asked me to keep him posted on my search. What search you may ask – well, I have decided that I am ready to try to find the Dom that I want and feel I need. I have no idea how to go about said search, but I believe I am ready to begin. Daddy and I really were lucky in my mind to have found each other and have each other over these past 4 years or so, but I think the right one is out there.

So, I promise to try to write more once again. And, hopefully, tomorrow’s post will make up for being gone from these pages so long. I am working on something that really excites me. :)